We Are All Meant to Be Happy: Keys for Going from Desperately Miserable to Joyful and Glad To Be Here

 A joyful woman runs on the beach

As a very little girl, I was a joyful being and I remember it well so exuberant and happy I was. This is how we all enter the world–happy to be here and experience life and give back to it, but along the way social consciousness beats us down. Before long, we’ve lost a huge portion of ourselves. Add to this other life circumstances and relationships we enter into and unless we’re buddhas ourselves, we become emotionally scarred, often sad and scared, even joyless. God doesn’t mean for us to be anything other than happy and joyful. It really is all a choice we make. Let me share with you how I turned a desperately miserable life around to one of appreciation, exhilaration, happiness and joy.

It started when I became acutely aware of an underlying nagging feeling that things weren’t right, that I was on a spiritual path but something wasn’t lining up right. My journey had lost its radiance because I felt oppressed, controlled and fearful. Right or wrong, that’s how I was feeling and no matter how much I tried to re-align myself with people I had spent so many years with and no matter how much I prayed and commanded to make it all right, I finally realized I had to remove myself from it all—both the people and the everyday structure.

My feelings were letting me know (in fact, almost screaming to me) that it was time to make a shift. What I was living just wasn't in alignment with the core of my being which is actually creative, free, expressive and joyful. I didn’t run away to a far off place. I simply extricated myself in order to regain my true bearings. I stepped out and it was scary because I was leaving a way of life behind that had become familiar. Spiritual groups usually start out with the highest ideals and intentions. It's just that with some of them people and egos mess them up over time. I guess that's part of the lesson, though, for everyone concerned.


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Sometimes you just have to get out of the cloud before you can see clearly. It may well be that the people around you are not playing any part whatsoever in your unhappiness. If you have mutual unconditionally loving and accepting relationships in your life, that’s a good sign you want to keep them. We just step away from what is not serving our vitality of self even after we’ve given it our all. 

Next, I placed focus on the nurturing and loving of myself. I realized that the act of removing myself from the hamster wheel I was on was an act of love for myself and I wanted to more fully explore loving myself as I had heard it preached for decades. I never could just look in the mirror and say, “I love you, I love you” without it feeling fake, but now I can look in the mirror and talk to myself this way.

And here's how I came to love of myself and this one’s a big one: I consciously opened myself to receive infinite knowledge and wisdom. With my intention, I allowed myself to receive all that the divine universal had to offer me. I did this a lot without attachment or neediness or in the spirit of trying to make something happen.

Almost immediately, I was directed to a pivotal book in my life here, a moving song there, a profound message in meditation, resolutions in dreams, powerful insights on long walks… all of these began coalescing in my life where I could better see who I was and what wasn’t to love there?! I came to the recognition very soon that I’ve traveled eons with mySelf going through thick and thin with mySelf and what finer more brilliant companion or lover could I ever have than mySelf? I actually had experiences of my divine self. I was able to more often see the beautiful perfection of the great being I am. I could now not only love myself, I could enjoy myself. I could be happy. Happiness and joy were effortless. 

I have continued to build on that point in my life because there’s never really an end to it. In fact, I may have only just scratched the surface. It’s hard to imagine what more love, happiness and joy will feel like or that it’s even possible but I know it is.

There is no one way to do anything. The universe is infinitely abundant. To believe there is only one way or one course to wherever it is we’re going is far too limited thinking for a being living in an infinite universe. Because of this, we don't have to feel we've messed up. The result we think we are supposed to achieve is so very often not at all what we designed for ourselves before we incarnated. We also tend to observe our actions more superficially than multidimensionally. In other words, we may think we have utterly failed but the divine, from its greater purview and depth of seeing, acknowledges it as the most perfect accomplishment even when it looks to our eyes like a failure.

Stop and think about it. Our movement from sad to happy begins with choice. We are not prisoners of unhappiness unless we choose to be.

And how can we create very much of beauty in our lives if we are trying to sow the seeds of happiness, joy, creativity, productivity, and higher spirituality in lackluster depleted soil? I’m certain that I will not ascend my body from a joyless state of being. It is our fidelity to ourselves to return to our original joyful state as much as we possibly can. Heaven can be truly here on earth, right here, right now. It really begins with choice.